turkey hunter

Chris has decided that he needs to hunt more than deer or elk. So the past few years he's got wild turkey licenses for him and Tyler.  Well this year he got one.

It sat in our freezer for over a week, until he could take it to the taxidermist. I guess we'll have a wildlife museum in our house...

in other news, 

Cameron won a gun at the WTF banquet (wild turkey federation) Chris is a member of the planning committee for the banquet. I may have a few other hunters, Jeremy and Cameron just need to take hunters safety course.

Celebrations

There really have been good things happening in our lives, despite what it may sound like,

None of the boys attended school on the very last day.

last day of school basketball game

Cameron participated in  two school programs, 6th grade only and the school Spring Fling.

Cam got to do bells in 6th grade program

6th grade program

Spring Fling: Each song and dance was about a color in the rainbow.

dont take pictures of me, MOM!!!

spring fling- sang "Black or White"

Cameron turned 12  and was ordained a deacon on May 31. 

newly ordained Deacon.

Cam wanted  legos and a kendama, the newest craze.

White- black or white

 Jeremy "graduated" 8th grade with a promotional program at school.

watch out high school.. here he comes

waiting for his name to be called

graduating class of 2019

Tyler turned 17 and went to prom (it was his first date ever),

Handsome young man

Tyler and Sidney

promenade -

dance (for the parents)

hollywood theme-sidewalk of the stars.

 Tyler also competed in state track in shotput. JHS boys took region title.

boys region 12 champs!

copy of region 12 champs.

after competing--in a hail storm
soaked to the skin

final throw of junior year-36'6"
not a bad year for a rookie.

spring fling- colors of the rainbow. 

Tyler lettered in Track! 

track awards ceremony- region 12 champs medals

End of an Era.. or at least my teaching career.

So the end of school arrived and it was with mixed emotions that I packed my stuff up and finished the year. I knew at the end of March I would not be returning to JHS.  It hurt more than I can say to be told I am not good enough (at classroom management to create an environment of learning).  The last week was especially hard. The senior goodbye assembly started it all. I realized I won't be there for Tyler's senior year or Jeremy's freshman year. I wont' see some of my favorite and not so favorite students progress and graduate. I had to tell many people I wasn't coming back. My answer is "just because." or "I need a change." and occasionally "I was let go (fired)."  It's nice to know that some parents and students were sad and surprised to see me go.

Then graduation night came and I got dressed up in my robes one last time, never to wear them again. I'm surprised I held it together during the few minutes I had to stand up front welcoming the graduates.  I'm so glad one of my favorite people in the world caught me to get a picture. I came home and cried, again.

Makenzie Christensen and I.

The last day of classes and packing up my things to take home was hard. There weren't a lot of questions from my students, maybe they thought I always packed my stuff up when I left for the summer. I threw away countless bags of papers and trash.  I feel like a failure. Not successful, confident or capable of anything. I know when I give up my keys will be another crying  moment.

My principal took all of the teachers to lunch. It was nice. He recognized those leaving the school and also gave each of us a card of thanks. I felt like the only loser in the group.  One was retiring (even though I know it was forced retirement), Another was moving to Kansas to work at KSU as a rodeo coach. The third had only been there a year, but was moving to go to culinary school while her husband started graduate school. And there was me,  No plans,no future, no nothing. Just thanks.

I had to go home and cry before going back to school.

JHS faculty lunch-

My coworkers brought me flowers on the very last day of school. That nearly did me in. I'm going to miss working with them. 

Flowers from Mike, Ron, Christie, and Scott.

I know I am good at my job. I know I am a good teacher. There is so much more to teaching now than even 10 years ago when i started. Teachers are required and expected to do so much, and everything that a student does is totally the teachers responsibility. Students now have no responsibility for their education. Its sad. They are so unprepared to cope in the real world, and succeed in college. (Derek proved that to me as he has probably flunked out of the U and has no intention of returning).

I do not intend to return to teaching. My classroom stuff is hiding in corners in my house until we have a  huge yard sale. I am selling my teaching materials and trying something new. ACCOUNTING. 

LDS employment services is amazing. I took a class and cried in front of my instructor, I am so overwhelmed. I feel like I have no skills, or practical knowledge of anything other than teaching. I know everyone in that class, at least the adults were in similar situations, or they wouldn't be there. however the last day, Sister Thea Hansen told me they might have a plan--on the job training. I just need a bishops ok. So there may be some hope after all. 

Of course top this off with the unknowns about Chris's back and job and some days I'm surprised I get out of bed at all. However I read in my patriarchal blessing a few weeks ago that I would be led to a vocation that suited my skills. It also talks about being a teacher to many. I thought I'd found my vocation, but I guess not. I have also felt quiet reassurances that everything will work out and be ok. That's so hard to hold on to that when my life feels like a mess. I moved back to JHS because I thought it was right. It felt right to be closer to my kids and stop commuting to Provo. I guess I'm back to to commuting. Whatever I'm supposed to learn from this, better be good:)

And the show went on....Payson Temple Cultural Celebration

I wish I could describe the feelings of the past few weeks. Our youth have been preparing to perform in the Payson Temple Cultural Celebration.  May 31 was the first time all 13,000 youth were together for a dress rehearsal. It took 6 hours to complete one run through. It was a scorching 90+ degrees which is really amazing since it had rained practically the entire month of May. Our two rehearsals on football fields were soakers,

waiting for our turn at Salem Hills -

raining again ..waiting for our turn under the bleachers

June 5 was the beginning of our bistake youth conference. We heard from Ed Pinegar. He talked to the kids about all kinds of stuff, praising them, counseling them, and making them laugh. Then we took them to Seven Peaks for a night of fun. June 6: performance day. It started out hot. Again 13,000 and their leaders arrived at 10am to practice 2 run throughs, with cameras rolling. It was fun. At 2 the stakes met at Rock Canyon Park to eat lunch catered by Cafe Rio.  it was a time to eat and relax before performance time. We had to be back by 5pm.

across the stadium some of our ward. Cam had his hand on his head, Jer has a crush...

That's when the rain clouds decided to show up. by 530 big rain drops, hail, and lightning and by 6pm the stadium announced that the program was temporarily postponed and everyone needed to seek shelter. The entire stadium cleared with people going under the bleachers or to their cars. Some kids and parents left, thinking the program would be cancelled. 

before show  -- trying to stay dry

After many prayers, the rain stopped and the show went on, only an hour behind schedule.

baseball number

cameron in purple hat, jeremy in blue hat

storms   

after the storms comes the sunshine

2000 stripling warriors

apple blossoms and  maypole dance

finale--rainbow 

I am so proud of my boys for doing the program. I know they really didn't want to at first but I think they learned a lot about themselves, especially Cameron. Tyler ended up dancing with Levan 1 ward, and Jeremy changed partners so he could be with his "crush".  Our neighbor girl talked Cameron into dancing with her, since Jeremy deserted her:)  I thought he'd refuse, or have a breakdown on performance night, but he didn't. They all did amazing. I love my boys and am so excited to have a temple so close. Now I need to go more often.

after show.... tired, wet, and happy!!

Payson Temple festivities

View from East side

WE get the awesome privilege of being in the new Payson Temple district. Our stake is one of 27 that will now attend this temple. It is so beautiful, as all temples are. Since the open house I have been able to see it three different times.

April 22- V.I.P. open house. Our ward needed 120 people to help that day. I took the day off work. Chris did as well and we went. We had so many people that some didn't have a job. So they got a tour and got to wait around until we were all done--we had carpooled and got all split up.  chris was one of the extras.  I was on the top floor where the sealing rooms are. Gorgeous. There were lots of smaller groups and only one  big group that day being guided by Elder Richards? the director of all the temples.  He brought in a lot of leaders of different religions. They were quite curious about the temples and our church. I tried to eves drop on the conversation in the sealing room where they spent about 30 minutes. They asked questions wondering why would we spend so much on a building.  about marriage and sealings and divorce.  And lots of other questions which Elder Richards answered without breaking a sweat. He also explained where the chandeliers come from, about the art, and glass.  It was pretty awesome. They seemed very receptive to what he had to say. I did get to see the entire temple-including places not on the official tour like the bridal room and the nursery.  I learned that there are two entrances which means two recommend desks. the east doors are one floor higher than the west doors--which is also where the baptismal font is.

April 26.  just a few days later the young women, their moms, and leaders were invited to come on a Sunday and tour the bridal room and sealing rooms. the temple matron spoke to all of us about the importance of their choices now.  She said to choose freedom which really means to obey the commandments. She also spoke to them about true happiness, not just pleasure.  The girls that came really enjoyed the experience.

Family at Temple-missing Derek;(
View from West side

April 29. Our family got to go on a tour-so basically the boys got to see it for the first time. Derek couldn't make it, but he did come to visit us the next day.  Anyway we watched the video on temples, we walked through the whole thing, got our picture taken in the tents and took lots of pictures on the grounds. This day was the best weather: blue skies and warm. The flowers are amazing, the temple is beautiful and I'm glad we live so close---only about 20 minutes.

Boys and their dad

spring flowers

The youth got to do one last session of baptisms for the dead at Manti on May 1. Jeremy and Chris went to that. Tyler was at BYU track and I stayed home with Cameron. He is 12 on the 22nd, so just missed it. He'll get to go to the first one at Payson.

The best part of all of the is is the youth Temple Cultural Celebration being held on June 6, the night before the dedication. We just had a stake practice--heres to hoping (and really knowing) that everything will go well and the kids will take the experience in and remember it always.  Cameron isn't wanting to participate, but I'm still making him attend every practice. Jeremy and Tyler are also not excited, but you wouldn't know it by watching them at practice.  I can't wait to see it live at BYU. It is being broadcast in every stake center in the temple district. tickets will be hard to come by, but my family will have at least 6. If I get a choice,  I will share with grandparents first, ward members second. I hope that isn't bad...

job hunting

May I just say that job hunting is not fun. I'm in need of  a new job, I am not being rehired at JHS and I've decided I'm not teaching again...at least not in a formal classroom setting. I feel like a failure sometimes.

I've had to look at every job, every skill, and every activity I have ever done to see if I have any marketable skills. Right now I don't feel like it. I also can't seem to think of any accomplishments to make me stand out.

Yes  I have visited with lds employment services, workforce services, got online at career builder, linked in,  It is such a pain to put all my information out there, on every website. why can't there be one place, one format for all employers to use so I just type it once, or copy/paste it. I even went to a JUAB county job fair Monday. Interesting opportunities, but mostly skilled laborers.

I talked to a professor at byu about what it would take to become a actuary. He says I really have to pass a few exams, no course work necessary... Maybe because of my math background. The first one is the P exam (probability)  the second one is the FM (financial math), then an internship. I might be able to take a class to prep for the P exam during spring summer semester. Interesting information.

I also have an interview tomorrow at the hospital as an admitting clerk. I obviously can't start until summer.... I told them that at the job fair, but they want to try it anyway.  (Not offered job, but it was just not enough $)  I also applied to work at Western Governors University as a student mentor, but I was passed up on that too. That was a work-at-home job.

I'm excited, but really nervous about where I'm headed. I may even go back for more training or get another degree. I love learning....too bad there isn't money in learning, just working.